Miracle #1 - Andrew Speaks

Andrew was about 9 months old when he began to say his first words. Then shortly after turning 1 year old, he stopped talking and uttering sounds all together.  I don't remember the exact day that he said his first word, nor do I remember the exact day that he stopped, but I will never forget the day that he spoke again after many months of silence. He was two and a half years old.

For a year and half, my son hadn't spoken. For months, we faithfully attended speech therapy. Week after week we would go, and nothing had come of it. While many children with Autism remain non-verbal their entire lives, I always knew that Andrew would speak again. I even had dreams about it on many occasions. In my dreams, my little boy would come up to me, look me in the eyes, and intently speak with perfect utterance. 

Despite my faith and expectancy, I was still caught by surprise the day I actually heard his voice again. It was just another day with nothing profoundly different about it than the days before. Andrew was sitting on the floor in his room with his Home Educator and I.  We were playing with a gear toy, when it would stop working she would prompt him to say “go" and then start it up again. After many trials, we were about to give up, and then, it happened. 

 "Go!"

The first time he spoke it was so quiet, that it was almost a whisper, and I wondered if I had really heard correctly. Then he did it again! When I heard his sweet and quiet little voice chant; “Go!” I was overwhelmed.

It was one of those moments in life that is so wonderful that you look back and think; 'Did that really happen?' I couldn’t wait to tell Nathan about what our little Andrew did. I also didn’t hesitate to call Grandma and Grandpa and let them in on the excitement as well. We were all so proud of him.

That day was an eye opener for me. The little boy trapped inside the outer shell of Autism was finding his way out. He was saying, “There’s more to me than you see.” And that’s how it’s been ever since.  He continues to surprise us by learning new things, doing new things, saying new things almost daily. 

I would like to say that it’s because I’m an incredible mom who is armed with patience and a special touch. But truly the only thing that I can take credit for is casting all my cares on God and putting my trust in Him. I have sown many nights awake in bed, praying out the cries of my heart. I have been presented with countless opportunities where I could choose to either believe the present circumstances, or stand in faith and believe in my God. He has continually shown His faithfulness. 

Finding Strength

As a parent of a special needs child, I've adapted to the challenges we face on a day to day basis. I may not live a normal life by most people standards, but I've eventually found my own normal. I've learned to live be plan life around my child's struggles. Even so, some days are more challenging than others.

Today, has been very difficult for me. Today, the magnitude of my son's obstacles seemed a little more prominent than most days. Today his needs were a little greater, and I was physically tired. I found myself feeling inpatient, unequipped and stressed. Today, I mourned for that lack of normalcy, whatever that may be.

But I had to remember that what I was experiencing were emotions, and emotions are temporary. I allowed myself to be sad for a brief period of time, but then I had to move on. I know that I cannot allow my feelings to affect my attitude and my outward interactions with my children. If there’s one thing that I’ve learned about my son, it’s that he senses, hears, and sees much more than I realize. If he can sense negativity from me, he will respond negatively himself. As a mom, my attitudes and actions make a huge impact on my household. So if I want to see change in the atmosphere, I have to lead it.

Of course, This is easier to say than to do. Sometimes our situations feel so desperate and tremendously difficult for us to face that we just feel helpless. No one expects us to have it all together. In fact, the more that we admit our weaknesses, the more grace we will receive.

2 Corinthians 12:9 says,"My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." Therefore most gladly I will rather boast in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in needs, in persecutions, in distresses, for Christ's sake. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

So our desperation, in essence is good news. Because when we can't do it, He can!  If you need strength, ask Him and He will strengthen you. If you need a miracle, take comfort because God is a miracle worker!  Every problem we face is an opportunity for God's love, power and grace to be seen in us and through us.

Just tell God your need and ask him for help. God will not hold back. Romans 8:32 says "He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him also freely give us all things?" Jesus said, "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you."

If you are feeling like I was today, don't try to bear the burden of parenting on your own. Let God's grace do a miracle in your life. Let Him step in and bring you strength, wisdom, help, encouragement... whatever you need! Just ask.